OK OK. . . first things first, I apologize to the THOUSANDS of readers I apparently offended by suggesting that only three people read the blog. I, of course, like to think that it is immensely popular and is currently developing a cult following. BUT, sometimes people find humoUr in a bit of self-deprecation, and modesty has never been my strongest asset, so I exaggerated slightly on the small side. It did provoke comments, though, so that’s good. Maybe I should be offensive and rude more often!

Moving on.

Today was Dick’s party. Dick is the chief executive of my company, and every summer, he hires coaches (read: buses) and brings the whole company (about 140 people) to his lovely country home. He loads up his big back garden with beer, wine, Pimms, and snacky items. Then he takes the whole company to his “local” (read: local pub), which he OWNS, for unlimited drinks and a solid, meaty pub meal. Have I mentioned that I really like this job?

Apparently, what happens at the party is that everybody starts to gossip quite severely about everyone else. As the new kid, I did a lot of listening, but it was still quite fascinating. I learned all about various colleagues’ crushes, sexual preferences, professional aspirations, and previous drunken incidents at Dick’s party; all in all, it made for quite an entertaining evening. On the way back on the coach, some folks decided to stave off their traffic-sitting boredom by commandeering the bus driver’s microphone and starting a round of impromptu karaoke. Yes. Karaoke. They sang various hits from Grease, a rousing British-accented version of American Pie, My FavoUrite Things, and even Somewhere Over the Rainbow.

Wow. When these folks loosen up, they really don’t mess around.

OH! I also learned that my fellow employees were relieved to find out that I am actually not a religious zealot of any type. Apparently this was of significant concern considering my American origins. INnnnteresting. . . I suppose it’s only fair, considering that I thought they’d all be a bunch of crazy weather-talkers.